5 Everyday Toddler Tantrums – at 15 months old!

Life with a toddler
everyday toddler tantrums picture from visit to bristol zoo
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So, it’s all over the news that a mum was asked to leave John Lewis when her 16 month old daughter threw a tantrum (check it out here if you haven’t).

To those who say, this isn’t news. No it’s not news, toddlers throw tantrums, everyone knows that. What is news, is a huge child-friendly company asking a poor mum to leave their store. That’s just NOT helpful. Toddlers, like babies, pick up on their mum’s emotions, so this poor lady, who was already stressed and trying to calm her daughter was then angered/annoyed/affronted/embarrassed and forced to leave her purchases and carry her daughter out. This is the worst thing EVERY for a toddler, who like ALL newly walking toddlers, wanted to walk and did NOT want to be carried. I feel this lady’s pain and her anger, I’d be furious too.

everyday toddler tantrums pushchairs car seats walking 15 month old
Walking leads to MAJOR temper tantrums. We had tantrums from 10/11 months, but now H is walking they’re daily. Yes my life is a bit stressful now, I have to figure out a new way to placate a toddler every day. I’m sure you’re wondering why…. let me explain:

1. Car seats

This is my biggest headache, at?15 months old, Toddler H, just wants to walk everywhere. She doesn’t understand it’s not always possible, WHY would she want to get in the car? She can walk! Why would she want to be carried across the car park to the shopping trolley? She can walk! For the last month, every time I attempt to out her in the car she screams. I am a horrible mummy telling her she can’t walk…. Seriously, she screams the street down. I feel so bad for my neighbours, and the surrounding streets… and the cows at the farm 1/4 of a mile away… This is a tantrum that happens EVERY SINGLE TIME I open the car door. However, I’m doing my best, but I’m afraid I have to leave the house, so I just have to put up with this. Treat bribes and bread sticks are the closest I sometimes get to a quieter (believe me not quiet!) exit from the house.

2. High chairs

“Let me OUT!”

Every week after our weekly baby class we have coffee at Whole Foods. Every week for the last month, H throws a tantrum when she’s finished her snack. She wants out, and she wants to run about. I feel terrible every week, I don’t want to subject anyone to a toddler crying, but H needs a snack before getting in the car to go home as that’s when she’ll fall asleep for her only nap of the day. She needs a nap, even just 20 minutes, which is often all it is. So Whole Foods diners, yes you smile and comment, you try to make h and her friend’s laugh…. and you’ve always been kind to us when she’s been getting grumpy. I really appreciate it, it’s the small things that help, the understanding. But, I still see the occasional look, and I want the ground to swallow me up. Yes, and on many other occasions in other places, pubs, restaurants etc. too, I really feel terrible. I’d love to stop these tantrums, I do try to limit them, I really try, but this phase just needs to run it’s course. I’m sorry. I’ll be much less stressed when they end, but I know they’ll be replaced by a different tantrum.

3. Pushchairs

“I can walk and RUN”

This one is a biggie… if she’s on being ‘confined’ in her car seat, then it’s usually her pushchair. Here’s an example: I had lunch with a friend and her 2 year old about 6 weeks ago, and H refused to go back in her pushchair. She screamed and ran. She has mastered the art of floppy shoulders with incredible back arching and wriggling, so just like a snake she cannot be held. The pub we had lunch in was big, but it felt like every single eye in the place was on me. I felt embarrassed, I wanted the ground to swallow us up. I was stuck to know what to do and just wanted to get out of there. After trying a couple more times to get her into her pushchair so we could leave, I gave in pulling out her brand spanking new reins. She shocked us walking a good distance home. She really was serious, she could walk! Now, onto what I learnt, I learnt H was right, she could walk. I learnt, I could only do my best to limit tantrums and really there is nothing I can do but let it run it’s course or get out of there in the quietest quickest way I could. However, I would have gone to the papers, I would have been posting to every media outlet there is, if I had been asked to leave. The manager did hold the door open for us, but that was actually helpful with 2 pushchairs, and one toddler on reins! All parents go through their toddlers having tantrums, all parents have been there even if they’ve blocked it from their mind, and all parents should be able to sympathise.

We also get tantrums that she’s been in the pushchair too long, 10 minutes is enough to renew her energy and she’s like… “I NEED out!!”

4. TV remotes (also swap for mummy’s phone, iPad, watch, cup of tea,… the table lamps I can now reach).

“I MUST have xxxx” I MUST chew the remote”

I don’t think I need to say anymore, just any one of these can cause a meltdown like no other if taken from a toddler. She must have them, she must lock mummy’s phone so there can be no more play dates and the phone is wiped clean. Hmmmm mummy thinks not. I find Hey Duggee or sometimes Twirlywoos can help.

5. Stair gates

“I WANT to go up the stairs, I WANT TO GO TO THE KITCHEN.”

That is all, there is no explanation, she just needs to escape. Sometimes she needs to hang onto the stair gate as shown, other times she hangs on with one hand so she can scream facing me. Sometimes she also does this one for fun, laughing and shrieking. Mummy runs down the hall every time.

everyday toddler tantrums pushchairs car seats walking stair gate 15 month old

 

As for that John Lewis incident…. it’s the complaints that trouble me the most

From what I’ve read the John Lewis employee said it was due to customer complaints. Seriously, I don’t know anyone who would go to a member of staff and complain about a toddler tantrum. I’m sure there were looks and muttering, there always?are. However, I’m sure there were also many other parents, many shopping for Mother’s Day gifts, who were thinking “I know how that feels”, and following the member of staff’s actions, were also annoyed. It would have been much more fitting for the member of staff to try to help, after all John Lewis is a family shop, it sells toys, nursery furniture, baby and children’s clothes, it has baby changing facilities. And for goodness sake, it’s Christmas adverts are ‘family’, they’re filled with children! Ok, so not children mid-temper tantrum, but everyone knows children aren’t like those in the John Lewis advert!

What do you think? Does your toddler throw tantrums like this? Any tips?

Lynne x

Disclaimer: Please note, I’m no expert, I’m just a mummy dealing with everything new mummy-hood throws at me 🙂

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21 Comments

  • Reply
    Emma
    March 9, 2016 at 7:41 am

    The John Lewis thing left me baffled too. Did anyone really complain? Normally people are very understanding of a toddler having a tantrum. If they weren’t I would have banned from most of our local shops by now! #bestandworst
    Emma recently posted…Home Office DreamsMy Profile

  • Reply
    Unhinged Mummy (aka Janine Woods)
    March 9, 2016 at 11:02 am

    My 4 yr old had an almighty melt down in a shop in town last week. One mum started shaking her head and tutting. If I wasn’t dealing with my son at the time I would have told her where to go. If I’d have been asked to leave I’d have been raging! My son has special needs. The woman in the shop wouldn’t have known that but she shouldn’t have been so quick to judge. As for the poor mum mentioned in this article, her child is 16 months old for goodness sake. She should not have been asked to leave. She should have been asked if there was anything they could do to help. Trying to deal with a tantruming toddler is hard enough without being made to feel ashamed.
    Unhinged Mummy (aka Janine Woods) recently posted…Happy Mothers DayMy Profile

  • Reply
    Wicked wednesdays - 10.03.16 - I Want To Climb The Stairs Toddler Tantrum! - New Mummy Blog
    March 9, 2016 at 11:14 am

    […] ← 5 Everyday Toddler Tantrums – at 15 months old! […]

  • Reply
    Katy - Hot Pink Wellingtons
    March 9, 2016 at 4:02 pm

    My boy has the opposite issue – he never wants to walk, he wants me to carry him everywhere! And preferably pick him up all the time we’re at home too! If not, a tantrum ensues!

    I really feel for the mum in this news story, and I’m really surprised at John Lewis, who make such an effort to be family friendly (I love their baby changing rooms!), even if it was just the actions of one member of staff. The comments as well have really revealed how intolerant people in general can be of little children – tantrums will happen, it’s embarrassing and annoying for everyone, but it’s a fact of life! #BloggerClubUK
    Katy – Hot Pink Wellingtons recently posted…Rosie Huntington-Whiteley Makeup for M&SMy Profile

  • Reply
    Nige higgins
    March 9, 2016 at 4:57 pm

    Don’t we just love our kids tantrums are so much fun not but in truth just a part of growing up I didn’t see the John Lewis story that absurd #bestandworst

  • Reply
    Sara at Handy Herbs
    March 9, 2016 at 6:37 pm

    I completely agree with your view on the J L incident! I am fairly certain that every parent has had a child at some point or other having a tantrum. No tips from me I’m afraid other than never to give in and be consistent. Hopefully that means they stop sooner rather than later. That’s a great big hope!! 🙂
    Sara at Handy Herbs recently posted…Great Reasons to Grow RocketMy Profile

  • Reply
    Sara at Handy Herbs
    March 9, 2016 at 6:38 pm

    Whoops – #BloggerClubUK
    Sara at Handy Herbs recently posted…Great Reasons to Grow RocketMy Profile

  • Reply
    Baby Isabella
    March 9, 2016 at 10:13 pm

    Oooo we heard about the John Lewis story. That’s aweful!! It’s bad enough wanting the ground to swallow you up never mind being asked to leave a store!! I have tantrums too and couldn’t imagine being treated that badly #bloggerClubUK
    Baby Isabella recently posted…Going Nutty for Putty!My Profile

  • Reply
    Sarah | Life of a Digital Mum
    March 9, 2016 at 10:26 pm

    Aah that brings it all back! I am so pleased to have a 4 year old that’s past that phase!!
    Sarah | Life of a Digital Mum recently posted…Life of a Digital Mum has moved…My Profile

  • Reply
    Sarah | Digital Motherhood
    March 9, 2016 at 10:26 pm

    Aah that brings it all back! I am so pleased to have a 4 year old that’s past that phase!!

  • Reply
    Talya
    March 10, 2016 at 1:46 pm

    OMG I feel like I am literally reliving the hell all over again! We are in a different hell now lol. Thanks for linking up to #coolmumclub lovely x
    Talya recently posted…Expert Editions vol. 4: How to unleash our children’s potentialMy Profile

  • Reply
    Yvonne
    March 10, 2016 at 4:26 pm

    Oh yes, in the middle of the twin-tantrum years so can relate to this. The John Lewis story really annoyed me, I have lost count of the amount of times I have had to deal with a screeching toddler in a shop #coolmumclub

  • Reply
    Becky at PinksCharming
    March 10, 2016 at 5:15 pm

    Tantrums are the worse and I always feel so sorry for people when I see them going through it. There is no right way to deal with it, whatever you try, it won’t work all of the time. Though it does feel like winning the lottery if it does work! Becky x #bestandworst
    Becky at PinksCharming recently posted…Kitchen interior design ideas: new worktops, tiles & cookerMy Profile

  • Reply
    helen gandy
    March 10, 2016 at 8:19 pm

    We have most certainly had our fair share of tantrums and I cringe, I hate it, I hate the feeling of being stared at but I try my best, I think we all do, I would be completely mortified if I was ever asked to leave a store because of this. Thanks for linking up #bestandworst
    helen gandy recently posted…Best and Worst Linky #41My Profile

  • Reply
    Lauren
    March 11, 2016 at 10:05 am

    At the moment my 15 month old throws a strop when its time for nappy changing or when he can’t have something he wants – not too often luckily! Totally looking forward to when he changes and throws a tantrum at everything (not!)

  • Reply
    Briony
    March 11, 2016 at 11:06 am

    Oh the car seat tantrum, we still have the car seat tantrum, sorry this one lasts a while. We’re over the pushchair tantrum, but only because he broke me and we never use it any more 🙂 #TheList
    Briony recently posted…Things to Know About Working from Home #1My Profile

  • Reply
    Tammymum
    March 13, 2016 at 10:15 am

    Yep, yep and yep. We have all those tantrums on a daily basis, other favourites include ‘I don’t care if my dinners too hot I want it now’ strop and ‘what do you mean you can’t understand want I’m saying’ strop. *sighs and carrys on* #thelist
    Tammymum recently posted…It’s all about that..CAKE!My Profile

    • Reply
      newmummy
      March 22, 2016 at 10:25 am

      Oooooh yes! And I want more porridge now, make it quicker!

  • Reply
    Becky, Cuddle Fairy
    March 14, 2016 at 12:58 pm

    Yup I’ve seen them all! My advice is to carry on with what has to be done & the toddler will eventually realize that the tantrum doesn’t get them anywhere. If it’s time for the car then they have to go in the seat there is no choice. Same with the high chair or stair gates. Hold strong & it will eventually end. In restaurants I always used to wait until my food came out to put mine in the HC as they had a limited span for sitting in them. Then I’d have some small toys or something to play with for them. Good luck – this phase will pass! Thanks so much for sharing with us at #bloggerclubuk x
    Becky, Cuddle Fairy recently posted…Ultra Pure Coconut OilMy Profile

    • Reply
      newmummy
      March 22, 2016 at 10:24 am

      Thank you for the advice! I do try, it’s just so hard. I guess that’s why it’s easier with two as you can’t give in 🙂

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