6 things only a parent would say

Life with baby, Lists
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  1. “No you can’t eat the remote, no not mummy’s phone either” (ok you might also say this to a dog!)
  2. “Daddy’s ipad is not a drum!”
  3. “Please don’t eat mummy’s shoe/shoe lace”
  4. “No don’t eat ‘Baby X’s hand/arm/leg”
  5. “It’s POO time! Kickity kickity kick kick kick, poo, poo, poo, it’s swim swim day, you need to poo poo poo, kick kick kick, poo poo poo, go, go, go…. ” (sung with a massive smile on my face jumping up and down, while Baby gets very excited, and usually poos ?). Come on people, I can’t have her poo in the pool, even with 2 swim nappies and a swim wrap that has leak protection, I mean, seriously can you imagine the look on the well to do ladies-who-lunch if I stripped her off and there was poo in there! We’d be banned! If not, we’d get looks forever more.
  6. “Where’s your phone? Do you not want to phone cat? What about dog? You don’t have a frog so you can’t phone him.”

I’m sure I’ve said much worse than these, but I’ve said all of these in the last few days and then sat laughing at myself for saying such crazy things!

What have you said that only a parent would say? #thingsonlyaparentwouldsay

Lyn x

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63 Comments

  • Reply
    Mummy here and there
    September 26, 2015 at 6:43 pm

    Haha brillant list and can identify with a few of these X

    • Reply
      newmummy
      September 27, 2015 at 1:08 pm

      Thanks! X

  • Reply
    Min
    September 26, 2015 at 7:59 pm

    OMG I have said all of these. I too have the swimming pool poo fear. I would say we haven’t had any issues yet, but we are swimming tomorrow so don’t want to tempt fate!
    Min recently posted…Why Being a Single Parent is Actually FineMy Profile

    • Reply
      newmummy
      September 27, 2015 at 1:08 pm

      Hope swimming went well! X

  • Reply
    Chloe
    September 27, 2015 at 10:05 am

    hahaha brilliant. We’ve definitely said the phone one. It’s mostly ‘don’t put that in your mouth it’s not food’. Our most use phrase is ‘it’s not a bear it’s a dog’ when Evie shouts ‘BEAR’ really really loud every time a dog walks past us in the street. x #sundaystars
    Chloe recently posted…#MYSUNDAYPHOTOMy Profile

  • Reply
    Azaria
    September 27, 2015 at 10:24 am

    I think I have said most of these things especially eating the remote/phone. My little girl is constantly trying to eat everything just now. Hopefully she grows out of that phase soon before my phone breaks with all the saliva 🙂

    Azaria
    Being Mrs Lynch
    Azaria recently posted…My Nappy Rash treatment essentialsMy Profile

    • Reply
      newmummy
      September 27, 2015 at 1:09 pm

      Hopefully! Fingers crossed x

  • Reply
    Jessica Powell
    September 27, 2015 at 10:50 am

    All so very true! I looked up the other day and found myself saying, ‘don’t chew the skirting boards’. That’s not something I ever imagined having to say!
    #justanotherlinky

    • Reply
      newmummy
      September 27, 2015 at 1:10 pm

      Haha I’ve not said that one yet, but I won’t hold my breath it’s not coming soon x

  • Reply
    Random Musings
    September 27, 2015 at 11:52 am

    Lol, love it, especially the poo song 🙂 #SundayStars
    Debbie
    Random Musings recently posted…You Are A Blogger When…My Profile

    • Reply
      newmummy
      September 27, 2015 at 1:10 pm

      Hehehe it works too! X

  • Reply
    Becky (@EducatingR)
    September 27, 2015 at 1:34 pm

    Ha ha love these. I do something think “well i never thought i’d say that” quite regularly these days! Maybe I should start writing them down! #SundayStars
    Becky (@EducatingR) recently posted…Mini Roversi becomes a Tumble TotMy Profile

    • Reply
      newmummy
      September 27, 2015 at 8:07 pm

      I know I do wonders sometimes x

  • Reply
    The Speed Bump
    September 27, 2015 at 2:09 pm

    Can totally identify with these! I’ve found myself saying “No, the stegosaurus doesn’t want any banana!” when SB is trying to feed her fruit to her toy dinosaur. And “Stop licking the windows!” – self explanatory, really! Great post 🙂
    The Speed Bump recently posted…Motivation Post: Student Parents, You Rock!My Profile

    • Reply
      newmummy
      September 27, 2015 at 8:07 pm

      Hahaha, I think I might have that to come once she’s a bit older x

  • Reply
    A Cornish Mum
    September 27, 2015 at 2:54 pm

    Ha love it 😉 Mine are 9 and 11 now I almost (only almost) miss the mini crazy people stage.

    Stevie x #JustAnotherLinky
    A Cornish Mum recently posted…Timeline and Jungle Speed – Esdevium GamesMy Profile

    • Reply
      newmummy
      September 27, 2015 at 8:08 pm

      Awww, they are cute x

  • Reply
    Catie
    September 27, 2015 at 6:28 pm

    Ha ha. Brilliant, you reminder me that we actually had the poo disaster in the swimming pool changing room. I never dared go back! #justanotherlinky
    Catie recently posted…Photo of the weekMy Profile

    • Reply
      newmummy
      September 27, 2015 at 8:09 pm

      That would be a solution, but we pay for lessons in blocks of 10 so I couldn’t afford not to go back!

  • Reply
    Sugar&Rhubarb
    September 27, 2015 at 6:48 pm

    haha the poo jive!!! We find the jumperoo the perfect pre-swim activity 😉
    #sundaystars
    Sugar&Rhubarb recently posted…The Demands of a Three Year Old DivaMy Profile

    • Reply
      newmummy
      September 27, 2015 at 8:11 pm

      Ooooh good suggestion, I can’t get her in it though, she gets really upset for some reason…. I must’ve overdone it 🙁

  • Reply
    Becky (@attwtwo)
    September 27, 2015 at 7:37 pm

    Ha ha – we say some ridiculous things as parents don’t we?! My favourite from this week is “you have to wear your pants to go shopping. People don’t want to see your willy.” #justanotherlinky
    Becky (@attwtwo) recently posted…I’m Dating a Married ManMy Profile

    • Reply
      newmummy
      September 27, 2015 at 8:11 pm

      Hahaha that’s brilliant!

  • Reply
    Luke Strickland
    September 28, 2015 at 6:24 pm

    Yup, can relate to all of these! SO many conversations about bodily functions with my two!
    Luke Strickland recently posted…Episode 16My Profile

    • Reply
      newmummy
      October 1, 2015 at 9:40 pm

      It’s unreal isn’t it! Thanks for commenting 🙂

  • Reply
    Karen
    September 28, 2015 at 7:55 pm

    Brilliant! Although I have to say we have had two major poo incidents whilst swimming and swimming nappies are blooming brilliant – no leakages whatsoever. The changing room clean-up was a nightmare though!
    Thanks for linking up to #SundayStars
    Karen recently posted…Sunday Stars 27th SeptemberMy Profile

    • Reply
      newmummy
      October 1, 2015 at 9:41 pm

      Oh I cringe at the thought! It’s always a relief hearing the nappies work 🙂

  • Reply
    Farmerswifeandmummy
    September 28, 2015 at 8:56 pm

    He he how funny. My favourite is ‘daddy is eating it like a good boy’ ha ha ha #maternitymondays
    Farmerswifeandmummy recently posted…#MaternityMondays Week 39My Profile

    • Reply
      newmummy
      October 1, 2015 at 9:41 pm

      Hahaha ? x

  • Reply
    Laura
    September 29, 2015 at 8:27 am

    “Did you get any wee on your toast?” (We’re potty training lol!)

    I love this list. I’ve certainly said and done some stuff I never thought I would since becoming a parent!

    #twinklytuesday

    • Reply
      newmummy
      October 1, 2015 at 9:42 pm

      Hahahaha oh I have all that to come, I’m sure it’ll only get crazier!

  • Reply
    Louise Rodgers
    September 29, 2015 at 4:01 pm

    Kids do make you say some strange things!! The most memorable thing I said this week was “don’t put your willy in your iPad!”
    Have you ever in your life heard anything so ridiculous? Well…yeah, you probably have!
    #TwinklyTuesday
    Louise Rodgers recently posted…10 Things You Need To Know About Little BoysMy Profile

    • Reply
      newmummy
      October 1, 2015 at 9:42 pm

      Hahaha that is one of the craziest!

  • Reply
    Julie Downes
    September 29, 2015 at 9:04 pm

    Ha ha brilliant list. Said most of these too, though not the swimming poo song. #twinklytuesdays
    Julie Downes recently posted…5 fab things this week #15My Profile

    • Reply
      newmummy
      October 1, 2015 at 9:43 pm

      Thank you x

  • Reply
    Cathy (MummyTravels)
    September 30, 2015 at 6:43 am

    Definitely said a few of these – ‘don’t headbutt the wall’ was a new one recently! (She only tried that once though )
    Cathy (MummyTravels) recently posted…Countdown to AntiguaMy Profile

    • Reply
      newmummy
      October 1, 2015 at 9:43 pm

      Hahaha glad it was only once!

  • Reply
    Sarah Howe (@RunJumpScrap)
    September 30, 2015 at 7:08 am

    hehe eating the remote and ipad were always ones I used to say when my gremlin was younger. Why do they eat everything??? Thanks for sharing with #bestandworst. Fab post and see you again xx
    Sarah Howe (@RunJumpScrap) recently posted…Best and Worst Week #20My Profile

    • Reply
      newmummy
      October 1, 2015 at 9:43 pm

      I have no idea! Testing? X

  • Reply
    Mumma McD
    September 30, 2015 at 7:29 am

    I have said quite a few of these in the last couple of hours alone!!
    #bestandworst
    Mumma McD recently posted…Time to Toilet Train?My Profile

    • Reply
      newmummy
      October 1, 2015 at 9:44 pm

      Some days are like that aren’t they 🙂

  • Reply
    Jenny
    September 30, 2015 at 3:22 pm

    and many more besides, and then there are the times when you are lost for words! #bestandworst
    Jenny recently posted…I am a Spartan! How to get fit after having a baby – run an obstacle race!My Profile

  • Reply
    Hannah Parker
    October 1, 2015 at 10:24 pm

    wow, I need to learn that poo song – we often have issues of this nature at the pool, so avoiding the inevitable poo rush would be lovely! Thanks for linking up to #TheList xx
    Hannah Parker recently posted…Bedroom Ideas with Wish ListMy Profile

    • Reply
      newmummy
      October 7, 2015 at 7:33 pm

      Definitely try it! Sometimes the high chair and singing it works… X

  • Reply
    Becky @ PinksCharming
    October 2, 2015 at 3:12 pm

    Ha ha this made me giggle. One of mine did a poo in the pool once (luckily I have the double layer nappy!) it was pretty hideous to clear up so if you can get the poo out before the pool, it’s a great plan! Becky x x #TwinklyTuesday
    Becky @ PinksCharming recently posted…ThrowbackThursday: the arrival of a new baby brotherMy Profile

    • Reply
      newmummy
      October 7, 2015 at 7:31 pm

      Urghhhh I’ve got shivers down my back at the thought! We do use the double nappy system too, but I’ll stick with the poo song as back up 🙂

  • Reply
    Random Musings
    October 2, 2015 at 11:27 pm

    Back again 🙂
    Thanks for linking up to #AnythingGoes
    Debbie
    Random Musings recently posted…Everything You Need To Know About Internet Trolls – A Rather Sarcastic Guide!My Profile

    • Reply
      newmummy
      October 7, 2015 at 7:30 pm

      Hehe thank you!!

  • Reply
    Nikki Frank-Hamilton
    October 4, 2015 at 5:09 pm

    Isn’t it funny when you hear what you actually say? LOL Sleep deprivation and lack of adult company, those were my excuses anyway! LOL

    • Reply
      newmummy
      October 7, 2015 at 7:27 pm

      Oh absolutely!! 🙂

  • Reply
    Caro | The Twinkles Mama
    October 5, 2015 at 7:13 pm

    Amazing isn’t it how much your vocabulary changes when you are a parent! Thanks so much for linking up with #TwinklyTuesday
    Caro | The Twinkles Mama recently posted…134 weeks | Me and Mine {September}My Profile

    • Reply
      newmummy
      October 7, 2015 at 7:25 pm

      It’s amazing, worrying, hilarious, flabbergasting… 🙂

  • Reply
    Victoria (Lylia Rose)
    October 23, 2015 at 7:16 am

    My most common one at the moment is ‘stop licking my arm/ear/face’ 😛
    Victoria (Lylia Rose) recently posted…My Pumpkin Lantern & Pumpkin Soup Recipe!My Profile

    • Reply
      newmummy
      October 25, 2015 at 12:11 pm

      Haha oh dear! X

  • Reply
    Arthurwears
    October 25, 2015 at 8:19 pm

    Haha this made me laugh. I’d probably have to add “no, you can’t eat the food out of mummy’s mouth” to mine! #KCACOLS
    Arthurwears recently posted…The diary of a 9 month old escape artistMy Profile

    • Reply
      newmummy
      October 25, 2015 at 9:01 pm

      Haha yes!

  • Reply
    Rachel (Lifeofmyfamilyandme.com)
    October 27, 2015 at 10:18 am

    Your poo song had me laughing! My children are 5 and 10 so Ipads weren’t around then thankfully haha! The remote control though used to have teeth marks on it so i can relate to that one! Thanks so much for linking up at #KCACOLS. Hope you come back again next Sunday.

    • Reply
      newmummy
      October 27, 2015 at 10:27 pm

      Haha 🙂 thank you for reading x

  • Reply
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    Trista, Domesticated Momster
    December 30, 2015 at 10:30 pm

    “Please get your finger out of your nose….NO DON’T THEN PUT IT IN YOUR MOUTH!” I am constantly saying that one ?Trista
    Trista, Domesticated Momster recently posted…~Childhood Memory~My Profile

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