There is nothing better than cuddles with my baby. I love that I’m there for every cuddle she needs. Every tear and every smile, I’m there. She had a nap yesterday at 4pm which she needed, surprised me, it’s something which never actually happens and it screwed up bed time, obviously. But I could just sit there in the car and let her sleep for a bit. It was lovely. I know that will change when Baby #2 arrives. I know Baby #2, your sister, is going to be a huge change for us as a family, and on my innocent baby girl becoming a big sister.
For two years I’ve been able to give my baby whatever she needs right there and then. I really do wonder what will happen when Baby #2 arrives this summer.
Toddler H, I wonder what will happen when perhaps you can’t get that cuddle instantly, when you want something NOW, when you’re hungry and have to wait, or just want to play hide and seek (in your hilarious toddler way of coming to find us and shouting BOOOOO every time). Will it be me feeling terrible for not being there as before, or will it be you? Will you start tantruming more or will you understand? I don’t have a magic ball, I can’t predict the future; I don’t know how this huge change will actually effect you. I do know that until then, I’ll make the most of my cuddles with my baby. I’ll take more photos of you, and us. I’ll be there for you, you’re still my baby. Soon, my phone won’t just be filled with capturing your every moment, you’ll have competition. Already you love hugging ‘baby’ (my ever growing bump), you’ll kiss bump and say “sorry baby” within milliseconds of nudging me (not even close to baby). You say “mummy baby cuddles” and hug my bump. You love to hug me, and pat bump, saying “baby baby” or tell me to “shhhhhh” if I’m unloading the dishwasher too noisily because “baby asleep, mummy, shhhhhh“. You’re caring and gentle. You really are understanding. But I doubt you understand the huge impact baby will have on your life.
As much as there is all this uncertainty flying around my head, I’m excited, full of hopes and dreams for Toddler H and her sister. Yes, I might miss capturing her moments, the silly things she does, the giggles and the sweet things. But instead, I’ll capture a bond between sisters. I’ll see you transform, becoming a big sister. I’ll see a bond between siblings, a bond I see in my friends’ children, a cute, caring, protective bond, a bond I hope never breaks. Yes, I know they’ll fight and bicker, I have a sister too.
I dream about them being best friends, thick as thieves. Having a bond, which I dream is tight and strong; never-ending. I hope that they both have their ever present playmate. I hope they’re like twins, just two years apart. I hope they confide in each other; provide a conscience for each other. I hope they share and play with each other’s friends. I hope they like the same things. I hope they do well in life, are kind, good friends, nice people, and above all are happy. I hope they provide us with even more joy and laughter than ever. I really hope that hubby and I can watch the two of them bickering, and smile, knowing in two minutes they’ll be skipping off together to play.
Above all, I hope they will look after each other, love each other and know they are so so lucky to be sisters. To my baby, Toddler H, you won’t be my baby forever, you’re becoming a big sister. I also know that before long it might be you, my baby girl, that your little sister seeks for comfort; it might not be me, and I’ll have to be ok with that. But for now, I’ll take every cuddle with you that I can get.
How did you feel before baby #2 arrived? Did you have similar sibling hopes and fears?